MERSEY PARADISE

My mate (poet, novelist and prison regular, Craig Bradley) reckons I sound like John Lennon. He only says it when he’s hammered though. I lived in Liverpool for a couple of weeks once, so I must have picked the accent up. I was kicked out of art college there too, fact fans. Last time I was there, it was to see a play at the Royal Court where I was sat next to the world’s most prolific streaker to watch him invade the stage sans his clothes ‘for a laugh’. True. I was working with him on his memoirs about getting his kit off aal awa the place at sporting events and other inappropriate gatherings. You may notice that the book isn’t on my list of forthcoming titles.

However, you may notice a new addition – The Fifth Pillar: The Extraordinary Pilgrimage of a Muslim Convertby Duncan Lyon. I met Duncan on Tuesday in Waterstone’s in L1 to sign the book up over poncey coffee (in glasses with nee handles, like) and bisquai (plural for biscuits, don’t you know). It’s not often that a story like this lands in your inbox. This is to be Duncan’s first published work and signed up through The McKernan Literary Agency & Consultancy in Edinburgh. This one will be out on 30 September, available on pre-order on the Tonto site and soon to be up on Amazon. I did get a photo of me and Duncan, but it’s too big to put up on here apparently. Any FaceBookers can see this and some comedy snaps taken round Liverpool once I upload them.

Info on the book:

February 2000.  Post-millennial optimism is still in the air.

Duncan Lyon is a 29 year old Scouse living in London. He has a good enough job, good enough friends, a good enough life. But, as he faces his 30th year, he realizes that something is missing.  

Having converted to Islam a number of years ago, he makes a spur of the moment decision that the time is now right to fulfil the once-in-a-lifetime duty – and privilege – that all Muslims have:  to perform the Hajj, the pilgrimage to Mecca during the holy month; the fifth pillar of Islam. 

So Duncan heads down to Leicester Square to buy a ticket to Saudi Arabia, and embarks on a journey that is extraordinary in so many ways, both in terms of the obstacles that confront him as a white Englishman who shows no outward signs of being a Muslim, and the array of characters – both fellow pilgrims and locals – that he encounters along the way.

And when he finally gets there, he discovers the true meaning of the old adage ‘Be careful of what you wish for’. For now he has to get back home.

Through a labyrinthine bureaucratic process – and his own internal conflicts and realizations as to what is truly important to him – he finds the sense of his spiritual awareness to be heightened. Conversely the mundane and practical difficulties he faces become greater and more imposing:  Encounters with the notoriously strict Saudi police, escaping house arrest, dealings with army checkpoints and finally the ‘privilege’ of pleading his case with inscrutable government ministers.

By the end, he is running across a runway in the middle of the night and the final scene finds him alone on a jetliner – the sole passenger on an eerily empty flight, leaving Saudi as a million more people arrive.

The Fifth Pillar is a unique account – a story that has never been told of a journey that most of us will never be able to experience. Beautifully written – atmospheric and immediate yet with the light touch that comes with the benefit of reflection and hindsight – this is more than just another travel book.